Say Yes to More of What you Love

I’m completely blown away by the reality that I could have never planned all the best stuff in my life. It really came from putting myself in situations where I had little to no control over the outcome, showing up and just being there. Yet we spend so much time carefully crafting how our day’s, weekends, lives will go, and it all really falls into the category of time spent on predicting the unpredictable. We’re also really bad at predicting what we will like.

What’s created best experiences are a few little habits that I’ve tended to follow for most of my life. Even when I try and get away from them, I keep falling back in. I think it’s time to thank those habits now for all the magical ways that they’ve created my current reality.

1. Know what you really love. – For me that’s Family, adventure, learning, and experience.
2. Say yes when the chance arrives to have an immersive experience into anything you love. – I’m not sure how else to put that, but when the conditions conspire for you to be able to fully dive into the most incredible experience of something you love, let nothing stand in your way of doing it. What that will take is a little #3
3. Be willing to leave it all behind. – What ever you are focused on now that’s not as good as what you want it to be, is you saying yes to things that are less than amazing and NO to the possibility of what could be life changing. RARELY, if ever does saying YES to something seemingly insane and leaving behind what’s holding you static ever make you far worse off than you already are. So what do you have to loose? The key is #1- knowing what you really love. Cherish and nurture what you love with all the care you can summon, but as for the rest, be willing to leave it behind for a deeper obsession with what you love.
4. Trust you’ll find your way. – I used to play in a band. I was arguably one of the least talented members musically, but I was great at creating connections, and at having ridiculous amounts of fun. One night rehearsing, I was voted most likely to end up in the wrong city on tour, join another band, tour with THEM playing giant shows, then finding the original band and having us all tour together, and assuming this is the way it should have always been. Besides having been less accountable than I would have liked to be at the time, I’ve always trusted that I’ll find my way. One foot in front of the other is the only way to move forward. Just keep going, and you’ll work it out.

Saying yes to making friends at Feria in Spain, dancing in private tents all night, drinking wine and not caring about where we end up tomorrow (We ended up in Portugal the next day. Long story) . Saying yes to kids when it seemed ridiculous. Saying yes to living in Malaysia, the Philippines, and Hong Kong when I didn’t know how I would further my carrier in any of those places. Asking my wife to marry me because I love her, not because I had a plan or was great marriage material. Know what you love, say yes, and leave the rest behind. If you want to see the world, test your metal, and sail your ship on the open oceans rather than being tied up in harbour, say yes. I’m certainly a ship who’s been in need of repairs, but what a ride it’s been.

Try it out. What do you love most? What are some of the ways that you have been saying no by default to what or who you really love? If you’re not sure, like I was unsure, try journalling about what you really love. It becomes so clear when you look back at what you’ve wrote over time. I know for myself I can skim though the pages and re discover the consistency anytime. Then start noticing, and saying yes to the little opportunities that present themselves. You might find yourself taking the long way home, staying at the park with the kids after school. You might find yourself in a new country doing something completely unexpected, but life will be full of the most rewarding experiences you can create.